9.13.2004

Myself

I've been learning a lot about myself and what I like and do not like while in the learning environment.

Most specifically, while I'm in college.

I've been having difficulty motivating myself to do this school that I've been doing. I mentioned it before, but the truth is I kind of found myself thrust into college this quarter out of sheer dumb luck. I was excited at first, now I just think about it, I'm dreading it.

For one, the program I'm in is not all that exciting to me. I'm not a business person. I work retail because it pays the bills, but I wouldn't want to work in a business for the rest of my life. I had a business at one time that i shared with my family. Truthfully, I didn't like it. I have no desire to head my own business.

Maybe its because my goal in life is not to be a rich successful person. I enjoy living and having fun. I don't have any desire to be a work-a-holic, and the fact that I'm generally a practical person that isn't into the whole 'bling-bling' of material things, well, if I don't need it, I don't want it.

In other words, I want to get into a job field that i enjoy that pays the bills. That's all.

Such as the army. As much as the army frustrates me at times, truthfully I do love it. I can do this as a job and actually enjoy myself (for the most part).

I'm just horribly lost and falling behind. If I go back to school, I want to physically go back to school. I don't want to do this correspondance thing unless I'm doing a program that i really like.

I'm lost. I need some serious help. (and I'm appear to be rambling as I am pulled from this posting as I try to get some work done. Good luck)

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