2.05.2005

T-shirt News

Let me tell you a story.

It all started with a picture. A picture largely taken in jest. It has become semi famous amongst gun advocates and some right wing web-blogs. It is a picture of me toting an M203 Grenade Launcher.

You know the picture.

The picture was taken on a sunny October afternoon. It was then filed away into my hard drive and then it sat there.

The presidential elections came and went, to the dismay of millions.

Some decided to whine and bitch about the outcome. Others felt the need to poke fun at the whiners and bitchers and set up counter websites in patriotic jest. I dug out that picture from my archives of old pictures and plopped the words “I am not sorry” along the bottom and donated it to the counter websites.

I crosslinked it to my blog just for kicks and giggles.

All hell broke loose and my quiet and usually spontaneous blog spiraled out of control and I got about three dozen marriage proposals in the course of three days.

Er, I wasn’t prepared for that. On top of all of this, I was receiving orders to deploy to the Balkans as well, so my life was kind of busy.

Fast forward to mid December. I was in Fort Lewis in the middle of mobilization and everything had quieted on the Blog-Front. And I get an email asking if I would become Patron Goddess of some conservative website that is all for the right to bare arms and hot chicks that like to bare them (amongst other conservative topics).

I laugh, and am promptly told my time is up. I close down my inbox and don’t answer right away, on account of my limited internet access and very busy life.

Finally, come January, I remember this email I got and decided that it would be rude not to answer it (along with the sixty other emails in my inbox also currently awaiting to be replied to and I vow heavily that I will indeed reply to them, eventually). My reply? “Sure, whatever.”

Immediately I am informed that I am being sent a T-shirt and they are expecting photos. Ok, no big deal. However, I don’t yet have an address to send the T-shirt to.

Fast forward to Hohenfels Germany. It is cool that I am in Germany, sucks that I’m in Hohenfels. The food is lousy, and I am promptly placed on the Hohenfels Weight Control Program. Also considering the fact that I walked damn near everywhere I went and was often skipping meals (and eating beef Jerkey and Gummi Bears instead, Nutritious) I probably lost a good three or five pounds in the week that I was there. But I did get an address to send my mail too!

I was in Hohenfels for about two weeks or so. To long in my opinion. Finally we fly over to Kosovo, where after two weeks of eating Dog Food and Egg Loaf, I am introduced to Chow Hall Heaven.

The outgoing people were commenting on how everyone tends to gorge themselves the first two weeks of getting here. I was no exception. The food, it was edible! And there were so many choices! I’ll take that, and that, and that. . .

Um, let me just say that I’m now starting to limit my choices at chow time.

Then, just today, I get my first package in the mail. Sweet! Packages are awesome! And low and behold, what does it hold?

An Official Patron Goddess T-shirt from Silent Running (with a warning that I have minions).

Um, I tried it on for good measure and took some pictures just to try it out and see how they would turn out, because Dad Nab It, the minions want their T-shirt Photos!

I think I need to start hitting that gym and start eating less grease and more salad before I get a decent picture for the masses. Because right now I’m feeling less Goddess and more Cow. And I don’t think the minions are Hindu and worship cows.

And I ain’t just saying that because I’m female and by default think I’m fat. Because I’m usually comfortable with the way I look. Just, um, five weeks of wearing nothing but Camouflage and it tends to camouflage my body even from me.

I vow to look drop dead sexy by the end of this deployment.

Crosslinked : Silent Running

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