11.23.2005

Stuff

The Snow started to stick yesterday. And it came and went all day today. Kosovo is covered in fluffy white stuff.

Which is good news for me in regards to the Ski Resort. I might be able to get up to Brezavica by the end of this deployement if it all works out.

Everything's packed, a sucky time to have a birthday, I can't even ask people to send me stuff from home, because I would get it, say 'wow, this is cool!' only to turn around and ship it back home again. So my family has offered to have a Birthday/Christmas Party for me when I get home. Which will be sometime in January or February.

Yesterday wasn't exactly the best birthday I ever had, for the most part it's been quiet, except for SSG Eades singing a Happy Birthday song to me this morning, which cracked a smile in my otherwise gloomy demeanor. Nate and a few of my battle buddies from Task Force Tornado also brought over a bag of goodies last night. But mostly over the last couple of days I've been deep in thought. Not depressed or anything like that, just contemplative of where my life is going.

An incident occurred over the weekend that I would have rather not happened. It was a case of me being in the wrong place at the wrong time and quite truthfully, like most of the rest of this year, I would have rather not gotten involved. I have a bad habit of wanting to do the right thing I guess, sometimes at the expense of others who do, shall we say, things they shouldn't be. I would rather if they want to do something stupid, that they would leave me out of it or not clue me in that they are doing it, and for the most part, this task force (or rather, the people in it) have been pretty good at doing just that.

I feel bad because the incident with my roommate at the beginning of the year happened because I didn't make things clear for her when we initially started rooming, and it turns out that she's not doing anything that nobody else in the task force isn't doing. (er, did I say that right?) And she's turned out to be a nice person, in fact we greet each other when we cross paths as I try to make it known that I feel no ill will to her.

I guess that's one thing about me that I've always known, its one of my great weaknesses coupled with one of my great strengths, how I can get angry as all living hell at a person and days later not hold a grudge against them. Unfortunately, people may hold a grudge against me, and all I can do is remember that this is only a year of my life, I've got two more months to go, and I will never see most of these people again. I can try to end it on a positive note (which I'm not sure I'm succeeding at, especially within my Task Force) or I can be sour and moody until I make it home.

Well, I've still got my goals forefront in my mind, rain or snow, i want to get the Schutzenshnur, and I've still got a mission to make it to Brezavica and snowboard with my friend Andrea who works for UNMIK (which reminds me, I need to email him), and tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I do have a lot to be thankful for, and being in a place like this really makes that come forefront in my mind. I need to keep that attitude.

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